for the past 3 days, i havent even missed you.
i havent been sad by the stupid shit youre doing
i havent checked your myspace JUST to make sure it still says "single" which i know damn well it will
i havent thought about how to figure everything out for you - so we could make this work
and last night, for the first time,
i had one dream about you, and the other about another boy
the one with you, you annoyed me, i didnt trust you, and frankly i kept the laptop on your side of the bed so you wouldnt get in there with me.
i dont know who the other boy was, but i didnt think of you at all while he and i were together.
im so happy that i dont love you any more.
i used to be sad, thinking you wont find anyone good for you on your own, which is why i tried to take you under my wing, but now i realize, youre destined to marry someone like your mother and sister. and they wont let you marry someone like me. it doesnt even bother me anymore. no tight lump in my throat, no tearing up at the past. i dont even miss you as a friend anymore.
how lucky i am to be free of you. and the relationship. and your family.
how lucky i am to have survived this whole experience, because for awhile, i didnt think i would.
youre a good boy, who deserves the best. unfortunately, youll never see that. i can no longer waste time with it.
your first kiss
your first love
and after we broke up, in your words, your "one great love in life"